Blogging the CNN Democrap Party Debate

Ok, so lacking anything better on the boob tube to watch, I decided to spin my dial over to Ted Turner's Communist News Network to look at the commie dog and pony show...

So here's the synopsis...

One dude claimed that he hated George W. Bush...

Then another chimed in to claim that he hated George W. Bush far more than the previous speaker.

Then some bulge eyed hag chimed in with a croak, that not only does she hate George W. Bush more than the previous two, but that she hated him so much that she wouldn't even sleep with either of his daughters.

There was some raucous laughter then some very short guy that looked something like this (only with dark hair):


chimed in to say something about how he hated George W. Bush so much that not only would he not sleep with either of his daughters, but that he'd also ask his friends, the star beings from Gamma Orionis to deposit George W. Bush on the face of the sun (of course only after the proper railroading in a trumped up impeachment proceeding).

Then some silver haired, balding guy stood up and ridiculed the previous gentleman's belief in "star beings". He did so in both English and Spanish so that all of his illegal immigrant voters would feel a greater connection with him. He continued to indicate that he hated George W. Bush so much that he hated everything he stood for including low taxes, the constitution and the whole damned country. His hate was so great, that he'd hand the keys to the whole shooting match right over to some random islamic dude in the audience wearing an explosive vest who claimed to be a victim of profiling as reparations.

Then some african american gentleman stood up and changed the entire course of the conversation saying, "I needs to axe a question, where the white woman at that gots a crush on me?"

The mention of that particular young lady caught the interest of the previously mentioned goggle-eyed female candidate who remarked that unlike George W. Bush's daughters, she would sleep with the gal who had a crush on the african american candidate without hesitation.

The candidates then moved on to address which one of them wanted to screw the troops the worst and declare defeat in Iraq the fastest. They then moved on to scrapping the free market in favor of the communist system, who would levy the highest taxes, and who would felate the president of Iran the fastest...

At about that point I became so entirely disenchanted with the process that I conceded defeat and switched over to watch an ancient re-run of Walker Texas Ranger. While that was far less fun than gouging my eyes out with rusty teaspoon, it was an infinite improvement over the Communist Party of America's debate.